How insane is it to marry an alien as a publicity stunt?
I’m Sunny Weathers. You probably recognize me from my reality show, Sunny Weathers’ Excellent Adventures. I’ve had to perform a lot of crazy stunts in my career, but this one takes the cake! The producers are sending me to another planet to become an alien’s mail-order bride. I’m not allowed to tell anybody it’s a put-on, and as soon my contract is up, I’ll be leaving planet Dakon. Unfortunately, I hadn’t counted on my attraction to Mr. Tall, “Darq,” and Handsome…
I’m Darq. The moment I laid eyes on the female with pretty mud-colored hair and a sunny smile, I knew she was mine. Competition for females is fierce, and I was determined to claim a mate from the latest shipment from Earth, so I broke the rules. If anyone finds out, my own brother will banish me to the icy wilderness, and I’ll lose my mate. I will do anything to keep her…
An excerpt from Alien Attraction
(Note: Mr. Buddy is a teddy bear).
Rustling sounded behind me, and I spun around to see Darq about to slide his leggings down his hips. “What are you doing?” I squeaked. The appropriate behavior would be to avert my gaze; instead, I stared, taking him all in.
“I’m getting ready for bed.”
“You’re taking off your clothes?”
“That’s the way I sleep.”
“What are you wearing underneath?”
He glanced down. “Nothing. What else would there be?” He motioned. “If you get into bed first, I’ll get the lights. The fire will illuminate the room somewhat, but I wouldn’t want you to trip.”
“Lights out. Good idea.” I grabbed Mr. Buddy as a tangible reminder of my mission. I was here to save Devon, not canoodle with a toned, tanned, naked alien who treated me like I was Terra’s gift to Dakonian kind.
I flung back the top layer of the kel.
“You’re not going to undress?” he asked.
Oh, hell no. I regretted stripping down to my robe and panties. I needed more armor. Maybe metal. Like a chastity belt. Or were those leather? Supple, tanned, chocolate leather like his pulsing horns…
“No,” I squeaked. “This is the way I sleep.” And tomorrow night, I would come to bed in every stitch of clothing I had with me.
Before I could utter so much as a peep or slap the teddy bear over my eyes, he’d pulled his pants off and kicked them aside. Without any self-consciousness, he paraded across the cave to the lights.
Okay, so I peeked! Can you blame me? Inquiring minds wanted to know what kind of package he was sporting. If tentacles were involved, I needed to know. I was relieved and pleased to discover Dakonian penises resembled Terran ones, except Darq’s was better. If his top half was impressively manly, there was nothing understated about Mr. Johnson. His penis was a prime specimen of aroused manhood.
Oh, Sunny, girl, you are in so much trouble…
He extinguished the second Illuvian lamp, and the firelight flickered over his smooth, naked flesh. Oh, to be the fire… I dug my fingers into the bear.
Do not touch the alien.
I felt a breeze of cooler air as he tossed back the top kel and got into bed. He smelled warm, male, spicy, and his body heat drifted to my side. If I stretched my arm…I wanted to curl up next to him and lick him like he was a chocolate Dakonian ice-cream cone.
This was no one-night stand where both parties knew the score. I’d had my share of flybys. If a woman wanted to get laid on Terra, she pretty much had to go with the flow. On this planet there were no one-night stands, no friends with beneficial arrangements, only lifetime commitments. I was here to do a show, after which I would leave, and he would be hurt. I’m not saying he would fall in love with me, but he had different expectations.
A teddy bear wasn’t much of a chaperone, but I tucked it between us. My eyes had adjusted to the dimness, and I stared unblinking, wondering how I would survive. Tonight, I could handle. But then there was tomorrow, and the day after that, and next week, next month. How long could I deny myself before I cracked?
“G-good night,” I said.
“You must be very tired after your journey,” he replied.
Tired? If tired was spelled with a W. I couldn’t have been more keyed up if I’d had six espressos. My buff-and-buck-naked alien with the pulsing horns lay a pinky’s width away. If I streeeetched out my finger…no, hands off the alien! “Not so bad,” I said.
He rolled to face me. “I would like to mouth-mesh with you.”
Mouth-mesh? “You mean, kiss?” I’d never expected him to be so direct.
“Oh, Darq…” That was such a bad…Yes!…bad idea. I had to let him down easy to spare his feelings.
I dug my fingernails into my palms. That damn teddy bear had failed at chaperoning! Failed miserably! I had only my willpower to save me. Don’t touch the alien. “Kissing isn’t…isn’t…something you should do when you’re naked.”
“When should you do it, then?”