#SpankingRound: Feminism and spanking: it’s simple really…

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I’m a Cara Bristol. I’m a feminist, and I write about women being spanked. Not just erotic slap-and-tickle spankings, but disciplinary ones involving the husband punishing his wife for breaking a rule. One of his rules.

What century are we living in anyway?

Well, that’s the rub–often pointed out by readers/reviewers who pick up a contemporary spanking romance and then vehemently object to a modern female being disciplined by a man. Even a fictitious one who is a figment of the author’s imagination. DD offends their feminist sensibilities, their notions of equality, their sense of fair play.

And I get that. I understand their point of view. My younger self probably would have marched in protest right beside them. I’ll confess that DD would not work in my marriage. I cannot possibly conceive of situation in which I would allow DD, in which I would be taken in hand.

But there’s one key word in that last sentence: allow. You see, despite the lack of “safe words” in a DD relationship, it is still one of choice by both partners. The goal of feminism is to give women choice and control over their lives. If a woman chooses to be taken in hand by her HoH, Β she should have that right, That’s feminism.

Spanking romances play to fantasies of domination. It is fiction. No real women are spanked in domestic discipline fiction. Women should be free to explore their fantasies. No one should tell a woman how to think or how to feel. That’s feminism too.

It’s that simple.

Please check out the other authors participating in the Spanking Round Table discussion on domestic discipline and feminism.

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19 Responses to #SpankingRound: Feminism and spanking: it’s simple really…

  1. It is that simple. That’s all! It’s a choice and taking away the choice is where we take a step (or 1000) back.

    I liked how Sadey Quinn ended her post so I’m ending my comment that way: The End.


  2. Maren Smith says:

    And that is the perfect way to say it, too! It’s that simple.

  3. Sadey Quinn says:

    You’ve summed it up nicely! πŸ™‚ Consent is the key.

  4. Ahem. Some women are spanked in the creation of domestic discipline fiction. Theoretically, of course. I wouldn’t know anything about that personally. πŸ˜‰

  5. Simple and clear. Thank you, Cara.

  6. Well said, Cara. And I think that point about fiction and fantasy is a good one too.

  7. Thianna D says:

    *giggles* this line : “No real women are spanked in domestic discipline fiction.”

    Made me imagine the following warning that would be added to the back of a book cover. “No heroines were actually spanked in the writing of this book.”

  8. thank you so much for mentioning safewords, Cara- I wonder if you can imagine how often I get into it with other BDSM practitioners about DD, the way I live BDSM, and “no safewords.”

    I appreciate how you touch on fantasy. It’s like my Master and I got talking this morning- I quickly got more philosophical than His sleep deprived mind cared for lol- about how it didn’t imply that He’s “a psycho” for enjoying “Dexter.” Sometimes, fictions just a release πŸ˜€ and we know we don’t want “it” in real life πŸ˜€

  9. Great post, Cara! Very well articulated! What you said absolutely sums it up for me in the most concise way possible.

  10. Concise and well thought out. I knew I liked you for a reason. πŸ™‚

  11. Renee Rose says:

    (laughing) “No real women are spanked in domestic discipline fiction. ”
    Yep, fiction is fiction, so very true!
    Thanks for joining our discussion!

  12. Casey McKay says:

    It’s so simple, right? I love that you mentioned the outrage of some readers and reviewers after they read a spanking fiction book. I don’t know what they assume the spanking will be in the spanking fiction.

    And yes, no real women are spanked in these books.

  13. sue says:

    one word – Brava

  14. Penelope says:

    Hugs from a fellow kinky feminist and spanking fiction fan, Cara – sorry for being so late to the party πŸ™‚

    Feminism is about choice, I couldn’t agree more. Who knows what is better for an individual than the individual herself? And if that includes consensual kink in some shape or form, it is nobody else’s beeswax!

    Love the disclaimer idea πŸ˜€

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