10 author taglines you WON’T see (at least not from me) #humor

Author TaglinesI plan to change my author tagline (Erotic stories to light your fire), and I’ve been brainstorming some ideas. Big reveal to come soon! In the meantime, here are the “punch-drunk” ideas that did not make cut:

  1. Escaped from the Amazon dungeon
  2. On Facebook’s naughty list
  3. It has a plot and everything.
  4. Free of typos!
  5. I make shit up.
  6. Beats getting a real job.
  7. Stories you can’t share with mom.
  8. Raising eyebrows and hard-ons.
  9. Writing fiction anonymously from an undisclosed location while in my jammies.
  10. Buy my book. Buy my book. Buy my book.

What’s an author tagline you can’t use? Please share. I’d love to hear it.

preorder captured

Amazon US | Amazon UK | Amazon CA | Amazon AU

Barnes & Noble | All Romance

Sometimes the biggest risk is to one’s heart….

An ex-Cyber Operations field agent, Dale Homme has kissed danger and betrayal more times than he cares to count. Now he runs a clandestine factory beneath the surface of the moon Deceptio, where confidentiality and security matter more than anything. When a beautiful young woman arrives seeking a job, Dale knows within minutes she’s lying. Everything about her is false: her past, the people she claims to know, her reason for being on Deceptio. Illumina Smith? Even her name is an alias.

Logic says send her packing. His gut says she’s in trouble. She needs him. So he’ll do anything to keep her safe….even if it means keeping her captive.

Captured by the Cyborg is third in the Cy-Ops Sci-fi Romance series but is written to be read as a stand-alone novella.

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29 Responses to 10 author taglines you WON’T see (at least not from me) #humor

  1. It’s a challenge coming up with anything to match yours, Cara!

    How about:

    Read it and beat.


    Don’t try this at home.

    Good luck, anyway!

  2. Lisa Wells says:

    Gettting men laid one book at a time…

  3. Cara Bristol says:

    I thought of one more: Scandalizing them in the Bible Belt.

  4. Because why bother getting dressed up, or finding an actual man to go on a hot date?

  5. I’m stealing this one from Larry Block, but what the heck, great writers steal, eh? “Telling lies for fun and profit.”

    Realistically, though, number 10 is the most honest tagline.

  6. I pay so little attention to taglines that I can’t even remember the bad ones. Your list is pretty funny. It’s amazing how low people will sink to sell a book. I think anonymity tends to bring out more outrageous behavior.

    • Cara Bristol says:

      I’ve seen some real good ones, and I thought, damn, why didn’t I think of that. It’s a challenge to describe your work in a way that is catchy. And when you write in a couple of genres like I do, it’s even more challenging to find one encompassing tagline.

  7. Doing it vicariously through books.

  8. Jenna Jaxon says:

    How about “Romance for every Tom, Dick, and Hard-on.” Can’t wait to see your new one!

  9. Well, my working tagline for my WIP series is “Space bitches in space, bitches!” Somehow, I don’t think that’ll pass the Amazon content sniff-test.
    My current tagline skirts the line: “Space Opera…with girl-cooties!” But the ones that didn’t make it include:
    5. I write weird shit and sometimes dick jokes.
    4. My mom doesn’t know my pen name.
    3. This Tagline For Rent.
    2. The most sexless erotica you’ll ever read. (back when I wrote erotic romance)
    1. Screwing with tropes since 1996.

  10. Lisa Medley says:

    Humping to please.

  11. Siobhan Muir says:

    OMG#3, 5, and 8!! LOL here’s one:
    “I sell sex for money, just not with my body.” 😉

  12. Fun list and great comments.

    I keep thinking of a Steve Martin bit from way back. He used to play little songs on his banjo in his stand up acts and one line was “And the most amazing thing of all… is I get paid for doing this.”

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