Pauline Allan finds inspiration in pornography with See Me

Pauline Allan caught my attention on a chat loop for Loose Id authors. She bubbled with cheerfulness and enthusiasm over the release of her debut erotic romance, See Me, in which the heroine is (drum roll please), a pornographer! I truly enjoyed interviewing Pauline – she gave some of the best answers to the questions of all the authors I’ve interviewed. Her book, and the research she did for it, are fascinating. She certainly sold me on See Me!

Cara Bristol: Tell us about See Me.

Pauline Allan: See Me is a BBW/Rubenesque Contemporary Erotic Romance published by Loose Id. Sean Drennan traded his fists for a portfolio. Now considered damaged goods, he finds hope in Abigail Swanson, a shy pornography entrepreneur with a secret threatening to destroy their future and break her heart.

Cara Bristol: What was the inspiration for your current release?

Pauline Allan: I have to tell you that I had some pretty hot inspiration for this particular book. I was looking at an adult website for gay men while researching a M/M erotic romance. *winks* It’s true, I promise! I watched the actors and couldn’t help but to wonder about what happens after the director yells, “Cut!” The questions came rolling through my little brain. Who’s running the show? Are these guys jerks or do they have the same problems as everyone else? What drives them to act in pornographic films from websites like twinki? And then I had that ah-ha moment and contacted one of the actors. I have to be honest. He was sweet as pie and answered everyone of my very personal questions. I found out something vital about the glossy front of the porn industry. The people on the screen, many of them, are just like you and me. They’re trying to make a buck and build a better life. Sean’s mixed-martial arts background was inspired by my love of the sport. I was in New Orleans two years ago and met a waiter who also loved the sport and bam–Sean was born thanks to a nice young guy named Jonathan. Abigail, I have to be honest here, is one of my many multiple personalities. For years I’ve wanted to start an online erotica site for women and this was a way for me to live vicariously through the pages. The violence in the book was a seed planted by a song written by Tori Amos. “Me and a Gun” tells a very personal story of rape and violence against women. As with all my books, the sensual shape of a full-figured woman speaks volumes to me.

Cara Bristol: Are you running a contest to promote See Me?

Pauline Allan: Yes! Hop on over to my blog on today (April 6, 2012) and answer the question I’ve posted and your name will be put in a drawing for an Amazon gift card and free copy of See Me.

Cara Bristol: Is writing your sole occupation or do you have a day job? What is it?

Pauline Allan: I took Stephen King’s advice. He wrote that it’s okay to say it out loud. “I’m a writer!” So, when people ask me what I do for a living I say, “I’m a writer, and oh…I’m a nurse on the side.” I work four nights a week at two different hospitals as a Labor/Delivery, Neonatal Intensive Care registered nurse. I enjoy spending my nights with my babies, but come morning–I need a computer, a cup of coffee, and the voices in my head telling me, “Write about me!” “No! Write about me!”

Cara Bristol: How much of yourself do you put into your writing, and how much of it is pure fiction?

Pauline Allan: My books all contain some aspect of me. I find that my personality seems to come through more in my male characters than my female ones. My guys are strong-willed with a shy, broken side. My girls seem to manifest my sensual secrets. They have the courage I only wish I had and the funny quirks I possess. I find my female’s dialogue is spoken from my mouth. My friends read my books and laugh. They all say, “I can so see you saying that!” I’ve led a crazy, interesting life and have many aspects of myself that I draw from to create interesting characters.

Cara Bristol: What are your hobbies and interests?

Pauline Allan: Music is not only an interest for me. Rhythm and lyrics are a necessity for me to breathe. Searching the web for new artists and music is the definition of a great time for me. When I discover a new song or artist I’m like a kid in a candy store, buying everything they’ve created. I also enjoy reading. My background is in Religious Studies, therefore anything related to faith-based material draws me like a hound on a blood trail. I collect antique Bibles and enjoy research of all kinds. Boy, I sound like a nerd. Okay, I like to dance too. Hopefully that will make me sound more hip. I shut the door to my office and jam to Madonna, David Guetta, and Far East Movement. I also enjoy spending time with my family. And if ice cream is involved in that family time, well, that just makes me smile.

Cara Bristol: Please share a happy moment in your writing career other than a sale.

Pauline Allan: I was sitting at the dining room table waiting for my husband to finish up in his office. I had my laptop in front of me and was joyfully typing away. Everything seemed to be going great. Then it happened. One of the male characters, my favorite by the way, decided to do something I had NOT planned on. The words kept flowing. My fingers flew across the keys and I didn’t want them to. I wanted to cry out to stop, to tell him to go back. Don’t do what he was planning on doing. The story kept going and the tears started rolling. I was sobbing, trying to see through misty eyes, as the terrifying words kept going. I hated him for doing what he did. I felt lonely and empty by the time he was done. I saved the torment on the page and shut the lid on the computer and walked into my husband’s office. He looked up and smiled…then frowned. “Why are you crying? What happened?” he asked. I wiped my eyes as new tears replaced the well. “My Muse came to see me and she’s a bitch!” I turned around, head down, and stomped up to bed. Sounds horrible, but two days later I received my blessing from the Muse Bitch. Story #2 came to me and made Desert Seduction into a series. The character had to do what he did so the female character could flourish in book 2. Happy moment!

Cara Bristol: Do you think authors are different from people who don’t write for a living? How?

Pauline Allan: Yes, I believe authors are a different breed of humans in general. We are in our own heads 24/7. Everything that comes before our senses is a potential story. I smelled sweet corn muffins when I was in Savannah and Bam! the beginning of Desert Seduction was born. We see life in a more colorful way. We struggle. We overcome. We put it on the page. We like the hole we create to live in. Our characters are real and they tell us their stories and we are lucky enough to have the skills to put their tales to paper. Our laughter is richer and comes from a place we keep hidden because we laugh through the pain, we immerse ourselves in the mystery of life, and if the “others” are willing to take the ride, we tug them along on our journey and share the most intimate pieces of ourselves.

Cara Bristol: What was the best piece of writing advice you’ve ever gotten?

Pauline Allan: “I am a writer!” I’ve been a writer since I was nine years old and couldn’t say it out loud and proud until last year. “I’m a writer!” Thank you Stephen King. The best advice I received was from his book titled, On Writing. I’ve pimped that book like crazy. I’ve been writing since I can remember, but there’s something about saying it out loud that made the flood gates open and freed my spirit. Put the words on the page. That was great advice from several other authors. No matter what, get out of bed and get the words on the paper one letter at a time. When you’re tired, your stressed, your happy–just get the story down and worry about the rest later. Breathe the story.

Cara Bristol: And now, just for fun, what is your favorite childhood book?

Pauline Allan:Alice in Wonderland. That book fueled so many naughty stories for my adulthood!

Cara Bristol: If you weren’t a writer, you would be a…?

Pauline Allan: Music producer.

Cara Bristol: What’s your favorite TV show?

Pauline Allan: Mad Men and The First 48 Hours.

Cara Bristol: What are you reading right now?

Pauline Allan:Bonnie Dee and Summer Devon’s The Gentleman and the Rogue from Loose Id

Cara Bristol: What do you admire most about the opposite sex?

Pauline Allan: The subtle way they are sexy. A man can ooze sex appeal just by the way he holds a glass of scotch, the way he rolls up the sleeves of his shirt, the way he looks at you from the corner of his eye. He doesn’t even know he’s being totally hot!

Readers can find Pauline Allan here:



Facebook author page:


Blog: Pauline’s blog


See Me Blurb:

Abigail Swanson’s spirit has been battered, a body left for dead to recover to find fear and loneliness. Due to an abusive relationship, she is unable to feel the one thing she longs to have again. She builds a lucrative business specializing in the commodity she can’t afford to experience. Passion.

Sean Drennan traded his fists for a portfolio, but the cost was too great. Now, considered damaged goods, he’s unable to find employment. Desperate to gather some quick cash, he reluctantly agrees to take a job in the field guaranteed to make him sell his soul.

So what does a successful pornography entrepreneur do when her clients are demanding a tattooed hunk and her performers don’t fit the bill? She puts all her trust in an ex-con who has nothing to lose. Can he save her business and her heart at the same time or will his fighting ways leave him cold and lonely yet again?

For one voluptuous, scared woman it’s love at all costs. For one man it’s a new experience he’s more than willing to fight his way into. But can Sean and Abigail survive the dangerous ride?

Excerpt from See Me

“Abigail Swanson, this is Sean Drennan.”

Ron introduced him like it was a legitimate interview, like he wasn’t standing there in the spacious office applying for a job in porn. It felt weird.

“He’s finished the application. We’ll do the rest after he’s done with you.”

Sean extended his hand and was quickly greeted with a sweet smile. An innocent, full pair of lips parted to reveal white teeth beneath. Had he ever seen a sweeter smile? Not one focused in my direction.

She took his hand into her soft grip. “Mr. Drennan, it’s nice to finally meet you. Ron has told me a lot about you.”

He has? Like what, the size of my dick or how many reps I can do on the trap bar?

He knew his hand lingered too long, but God, she was fucking with his head. Abigail Swanson was supposed to be a porno filmmaker, one of those dirty women wearing black latex and carrying a riding crop. A Jenna Jameson or Heidi Fleiss.

The woman standing behind the metal desk was no Jenna and definitely no Heidi. She was apple pie and pompoms. She was the girl who wouldn’t have given him the time of day in high school. She’s a sly-look-and-run-away, just like the woman in the café. Only ten times hotter.

The long auburn waves hung past her shoulders, and that shirt… Betty Boop, really? And jeans? He wasn’t complaining. They hugged her full curves. He’d been so used to the gym girls he’d forgotten what real women looked like. They looked like Abigail Swanson. Think, dumbass! “Sorry I’m late, Ms. Swanson.” He let her soft skin slide across his palm as she released his hand. The loss was instant.

“It’s all right. The rain was coming down pretty hard. I’m sure the drive took a while. Please.” She motioned to the wingback chair in front of the desk. “Have a seat.”

Sean swiped his gaze over the room. It was decorated like the lobby, only more spacious… and with more plants. He wanted to smile. The air carried a hint of something spicy, exotic. Incense, he concluded when he glanced over to see the ceramic Buddha holding the thin stick. Filmy curls of smoke waved up only to disappear. It was massage-parlor-meets-boardroom.

Ron handed her his application. “I can fax a résumé over.” They both stared at him as if he’d spoken Vulcan. “I mean, if you want it.”

Ron grinned. “And what kind of qualifications would we find on that resume, Sean?”

The guy was fucking with him. He felt like an ass. Of course they didn’t want to hear about his internships and degree qualifications. There was only one requirement for this job, and it sure as hell wasn’t listed under the achievement section on his résumé.

“Right.” Sean decided to shut his mouth and stick to just answering their questions.

See Me Buy Links

Loose Id


All Romance eBooks

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13 Responses to Pauline Allan finds inspiration in pornography with See Me

  1. Karla Doyle says:

    Great interview, Cara & Pauline.

    Pauline, I love that you contacted an adult film actor for research! And how cool is it that he replied and answered your questions?
    SEE ME sounds like an engrossing story. I’m going to head over to Amazon now. 🙂
    Congratulations on your debut!

  2. Thanks for stopping by Karla and thank you to Cara for having me. This interview was really fun. Yep, I found my muse in a short, stalky, Italian with a smile that could melt an iceberg. He was very cooperative and thought it was funny that I was writing about a pornographer. He considered his work a job, not a career. I’m so blessed to have had my little story find the light of day.

  3. Qwillia says:

    Congratulations on the release, Pauline. It sounds like a great book. Don’t you hate when your characters run off and do stuff you don’t want them too? I’ve been there, so it helps to know someone has a plan even if it isn’t you. LOL.
    Have a great day!

  4. Allie Ritch says:

    Really entertaining interview. Pauline, it sounds like we enjoy a lot of the same music. Personally, I’ve always thought life would be more entertaining with a soundtrack :-). And I think most of us writers have had a character or two go rogue on us. Even fictional people don’t stick to the plans we make for them, lol.

  5. So true Allie! The song for the soundtrack to my life would be Army of Me by Bjork! I jam to that song on a daily basis. I tell you what Qwilla, I’m editing my Desert Seduction book for Loose Id to submit to my editor and I haven’t gotten to the “rogue” incident yet. I know it’s coming, but I guarantee I’m going to cry like a baby when I read it! I’m such a sap like that. Like I don’t know it’s coming for geeze sakes. 🙂 Hope you gals are having a great day.

  6. Skye Warren says:

    Great interview! I have always been fascinated by people who work in the sex industry, and have soaked up a few interviews. They are so ordinary and yet foreign at the same time!

  7. Yes they are Skye! It was a fun experience. I really liked indulging in telling him some of my naughty daydreams. He was tickled by my imagination.

  8. Cara Bristol says:

    I’m just over half way done with See Me. Such a good story; such good characters. The research you did really shows. I’m curious whether you totally made up the interview process Sean had to go through or whether adult film stars actually audition in that way.

    • In some of my other research I found that all adult film stars have an “interview” process similar to mine. They take the new recruit and pair him/her up with a co-star and watch the results. I didn’t want Sean to have sex with anyone but Abigail, so I had to get creative with that interview. The question portion that Abigail went through just doesn’t happen in the real world. It’s more of a will you do this…will you experiment with this type of scenerio. More pornography is being geared toward women because we are in a larger buying market now. Gay pornography is also on the rise for women purchasers. I’d love to sit in on one or two of those interviews! 😉

  9. Just wanted to drop in and say thank you to my wonderful host. Cara has been a great mentor and asset to my learning process. I also want to thank those of you who stopped by today to chat and also hopped over to my blog. This has been a really fun day. Hope everyone has a great evening. Remember that I’m going to draw the winner for the Amazon gift card on April 13! Check out my blog, facebook, and twitter pages for the lucky winner.

  10. I love this interview! So brave of her to contact one of the actors. I will check her website out. My rom/com spy novel I’m writing involves an underground porn video company (part of plot and romance). I think sometimes, readers forget what all kind of creative research we writers have to do for our stories.

    • Cara Bristol says:

      Pauline went the extra mile on this one, I think. Your rom/com spy novel sounds like fun. Will await the published result!

    • Thanks Wildcat! I had a great time doing my “research”! I’m excited that someone else is also delving into the world of adult entertainment. There is a very seedy side to the industry along with the fun stuff. I can’t wait for you to finish up your book so we can read it!

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